What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen