What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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