you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
