is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Randomize
