i just wanna soil my oats bro
Just found out my drug dealer is also a porn star. It's a good day.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Randomize