lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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