google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
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