ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
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