shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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