Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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