just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I need to sanitize my soul.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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