Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
