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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
