THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
You might have been able to redeem yourself had you not referred to grandma as "this bitch".
That explains the hand print on my face. That old lady knows how to throw a punch.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this is an emotional support booty call
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Randomize