I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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