HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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