I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
