I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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