I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
You took a bar mat shot.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize
