lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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