I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
