Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize