I wish I only lived at night.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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