none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Randomize
