this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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