he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
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