you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
