ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
