I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize