I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
