I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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