She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
Keanu Reeves Photobombed A Couple’s Wedding Photos As A Perfect Gift
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
29 Married People Share What They Used To Find Cute About Their SO—But Now Find Infuriating
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
