addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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