How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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