i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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