fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
it was like eating out sand paper
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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