that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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