escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
