I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
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