I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Randomize
