why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
