all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Randomize
