If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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