My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
Randomize
