Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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