dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Alive.
So much puke
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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