just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
God I need to hump something, right now.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize