my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
the condom got lost in my hair
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
