this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize
