I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
