i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Who shows up to work two weeks ago still drunk and freshly high on blow and gets a promotion and a raise? This girl. Good at business. Super good at being fucked up.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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