i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize
