So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize